I’m a Caregiver, Now What?
Some of us become family caregivers with years of warning while others are thrust into this role suddenly. No matter how and why it happens a caregiver’s reaction is likely to be a wave of emotions, immediately followed by the question, “Now what do I do?”
No matter what illness you and your loved one are facing, planning ahead can increase your knowledge and understanding of what you are facing, allowing a more advantageous position to make decisions. It will often allow for a wider range of care options and provide an overall peace of mind for everyone. Sadly the instinct to plan ahead is weak as most of us tend to wait until we are forced to make decisions. I strongly encourage you to overcome that temptation and take steps now that will pay off in time.
1. Get your loved one’s personal and household matters in order.
Is there a Will or Trust in place? If not, see that one is prepared while your loved one is able to make his(her) wishes known. Have a Power of Attorney designated, a Healthcare Surrogate appointed and Advance Medical Directives (Living Will) written and signed. Determine what and how household bills are handled, where bank accounts, property deeds, cemetery plots, and other important items are located.
Can you locate your loved one’s insurance papers, birth, marriage, and service discharge documents?
2. If need be, seek out professionals for more information on estate and/or financial planning.
Although friends and family may offer well-meaning advice, it is essential to get accurate and complete information. Area social service agencies or reputable and experienced Elder Law attorneys and Certified Financial Planners can prevent you from making financially expensive or emotionally harmful mistakes.
3. Involve the whole family early.
Let family members know what plans are being made and what help they might provide. If your loved one’s illness is a chronic and slowly progressive illness, like Alzheimer’s disease, it will be critical for everyone to understand the illness and its impact and the way you can best work together.
4. Take care of yourself.
Caregiving is demanding and stressful. It is essential that you look after your own physical and emotional well-being. Rest, exercise, and get regular medical check-ups. Take Your Oxygen First!
5. Schedule regular respite care to allow you to run errands or to have some time for yourself.
Services are available for a few hours at a time or a few days per week. Friends, family or local volunteers can help. Schedule it to happen on a regular basis and resist the temptation to skip a week now and then. It is a vital part of your self-care and often will allow your loved one to develop other social relationships that will be valuable to them.
6. Plan for Long Term care.
Especially with Alzheimer-related dementias, there will likely come a time when additional help or even full-time care in or outside the home is needed. Medicare and other health insurance does not cover this expense. Find out what alternatives are available before you need them.
7. DON’T TRY TO DO IT ALL ALONE!!!
Connect with people in the community who can help; join a support group.
Your NAN Navigator will work with you to ensure you have the support you need.
